e-book Learning to Let Go: The transition into residential care

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The decision for how to address the move is purely dependent on the scenario you feel your loved one would respond to best. The main point is for families to reassure their loved ones that they will be nearby and continue to see them which can limit any associated anxiety. Give them time to get involved in programs and make some friends. Let them get used to their new home at their own pace. If you visit too soon, according to the article, they may ask you to take them back home with you, which can make it harder for them to adapt.

Easing the Transition to Assisted Living

Try talking to staff instead to check in with your loved one. After the first week, try visiting a little at a time, and once your loved one is used to their community, you can begin making visits regularly. Give him a little time to adjust to his new home before you take him on an outing.

People with dementia often have times of day when they are typically at their best; if you can, schedule the move during this time frame in order to minimize stress. They will tell you they are lonely. They will ask to go home. These moments are heart wrenching but knowing that they are normal and that they will pass, can help get you through them.

A calm entrance will be less alarming to an elder with dementia. If you are constantly fretting and seem anxious, they likely will too. Point out all of the positives of their new community and the amenities that this move means they will get to enjoy. Encourage your loved one to be excited about the transition.

Moving to a care home: a survival guide - Saga

Even if your loved one has lived at home alone for years, and even if they will now be surrounded by many people, they may still be afraid of being lonely. Really, they are afraid of isolation from their family members. Respite stays are often a very successful way to ease the transition. Not only your loved one but sometimes even your close friends and family members will criticize your decision. This harsh criticism may force you to wonder whether or not you have made the right decision.

Because of their dementia, they may bring up the same concerns or fears over and over. Let the person voice their concerns, and be understanding in your replies, i.

Learning to Let Go: Making the Transition into Residential Care

Your loved one may appear depressed, anxious, hostile, or withdrawn. This may make you feel as if the choice was not in their best interest after all. Try to put their responses into perspective. Oftentimes, these can be ways to express uncertainty or fear. Your loved one may just need you to listen and offer support and comfort. Try to really listen to the emotion behind the words.

Never dismiss a negative comment or attempt to reason it away.

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Provide lots of reassurance. Use facial expressions, gestures, and comments to show you are paying attention. All of these caregivers feel guilty, even the ones who are taking care of their loved ones at home… Choosing to move a loved one into assisted living or skilled nursing should not be a worst-case scenario. You may have spent years of your life supporting and caring for each other.

When moving your loved one, it is extremely important that you not show your sadness or cry. You want them to be cheerful. Be as excited as you would be about renting a new apartment or buying a new home: focus on the possibilities. Does the activity room have a piano so that dad could still play? Typically, this is because another resident will go into a room that is not their room and walk out with a couple items. It is important to understand that this is not something malicious that one resident does to another—it is just a part of the disease process.

People with dementia typically have trouble understanding their surroundings, and they may not be aware of what belongs to them and what does not. It is very challenging for people who work in the community to remember what belongs to whom. Just like clothing and other articles, photographs can also wander off.


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Did they have any lifelong or retirement hobbies and interests such as gardening or music? There should be no extra charge. Take some time out for yourself and try not to feel guilty about it. In the early days and weeks everyone — you as well — will be grieving for a way of life lost and the inevitable decline to come — but in time, it is possible to come to some sort of accommodation with it. For more useful tips and information, browse our care articles.

No start-up costs, no delivery charges and the first month is FREE. Find out more here. The material is for general information only and does not constitute investment, tax, legal, medical or other form of advice. You should not rely on this information to make or refrain from making any decisions. Always obtain independent, professional advice for your own particular situation. Close Search Magazine Search Moving to a care home: a survival guide A survival guide for anyone who is helping a relative move into a nursing home or residential care home. Back to top. Moving to a care home: a survival guide 09 September Electronics might need to be PAT tested Some homes require all electrical equipment to be tested before you can plug anything in.

Some care homes allow alcohol, some don't Read the contract. You might get caught up in industry politics There can be a lot of politics between for instance, nurses in the community and those working in care homes. Staff might be misunderstood The care and nursing staff will be wildly ethnically diverse, which can be difficult for some residents due to cultural and language barriers. To do this, you will have to talk to the chef and kitchen staff to find out whether they can accommodate your request. You or other friends and family should join your loved one for at least one meal on the first day, and if you can stay for more, so much the better.

The decision for how to address the move is purely dependent on the scenario you feel your loved one would respond to best. The main point is for families to reassure their loved ones that they will be nearby and continue to see them which can limit any associated anxiety. Give them time to get involved in programs and make some friends. Let them get used to their new home at their own pace.

Introduction

If you visit too soon, according to the article, they may ask you to take them back home with you, which can make it harder for them to adapt. Try talking to staff instead to check in with your loved one. After the first week, try visiting a little at a time, and once your loved one is used to their community, you can begin making visits regularly. Give him a little time to adjust to his new home before you take him on an outing. People with dementia often have times of day when they are typically at their best; if you can, schedule the move during this time frame in order to minimize stress.